SORRY

in the hectic season I forgot to update all of you and let you know I would be on vacation until the new year. we are off visiting mickey and pals for the week and will resume normal rant mode as of jan 1.

I hope you all had a great holiday season and wish you all a very safe new year. (safe in the watch out for drunk drivers sense...not the lets all be afraid of everything bush sense)

I am sure the blogsphere is full of posts asking about what your new years resolution will be so I will not ask that....what I will ask is that you use this open thread to throw a suggestion or two (or five if you like) of what someone else's new years resolution should be.

ie.strider should comment more, bush should stop spying on americans or everyone should stop caring what britney and kevin are up to.

so in the spirit of the new year let's be critical...of others.

because in the end "nothing changes on new years day."

PEACE
strider

HAPPY FESTIVUS!

(click image to buy your very own festivus pole)

History of Festivus

Many Christmas's ago, Frank Costanza went to buy a doll for his son. He went to reach for it because it was the last one, but so did another man and as Frank rained blows upon him, he thought there could be another way. The doll was destroyed, but out of that, a new holiday was born.

He named it Festivus.

Festivus takes place December 23rd. Families and friends gather at the dinner table and have "The Airing of Grievances". please click here for the list of grievances worksheet. Durning this time, family and friends share all the ways they have disappointed each other during the past year.

After the Airing of Grievances, the "Feats of Strength" takes place. This is where the head of the household tests his/her strength with another friend or family member. The great honour is given out to a different person each year. Kramer was given the honor but passed it to George Costanza as he had an appointment. You can turn down a challenge if you have an appointment.

Festivus is not over until the head of the household is pinned.

The Festivus Pole, is not a tree. It is a metal pole with no decorations. Frank Costanza believes that tinsel is very distracting. The pole is tall and silver. (source)


for more about festivus click here.

a heartfelt happy festivus from me to you.

"FESTIVUS FOR THE REST OF US!"

MOTORCYCLES

first I watched this and thought....

"wow...motorcycles are awesome. I want one. I would love to ride one. what a rush. they must be so much fun."

then a couple of minutes later I saw this and changed my mind.

I think I will stay in my car.

F CONGRESS

WASHINGTON, Dec 19 (Reuters) - Congress rejected U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice's impassioned appeal to provide $50 million for African troops trying to keep peace in Sudan's Darfur region, the State Department said on Monday. In letters sent last week to the heads of appropriations committees in both the Senate and House of Representatives, Rice wrote: "We are in critical need of funding to continue this mission at a robust level into 2006." (source)

(every now and then condi and my views can cross paths I guess)

50 million.

that's all they were asking for.



we spend 420.7 BILLION on defense in 2005...



...yet we can't find a way to carve out an extra 50 mil to save lives.



is destroying life really more important than saving life?


Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
-Mark Twain

NO WORK MONDAY

here is another fun game to kill time at work today.

it's called the retail alphabet game.

on top of it being addictive there are 4 different versions to ruin your work day.

let me know how many you get out of the 26.

on my first try on the 2nd edition I only got 11 of the 26.

I feel like I didn't pay enough attention to the thousands of advertisements hurled at me daily.

...then again... maybe that's a good thing.

I LOVE THESE MOVIE MASH UP'S

here is one for "a christmas story" called:

A CHRISTMAS GORY

enjoy

previous video mash up's:
shining
west side story
and
big

I WAS JUST THINKING:

with all this bull shit talk by the right about how clerks should say "merry christmas" instead of "happy holidays" I have a simple question...

isn't the holiday about jesus and celebrating goodness...

not commercialism and shoping?

if their focus is on what clerks are saying in stores, aren't they forgetting the true meaning of christmas?

and as for saying happy holidays as opposed to merry christmas...

WHO GIVES A SHIT?

when I worked retail no one ever seamed to really care what I said to them after I just sold them $300 in cd's. they were more worried about where they were going to find tickle me elmo or whatever the hot gift was that year.

so to all the idiots who make something out of nothing...a big old..


to you.

I'll bet you they would also be pissed that I didnt capitalize "christmas" and "jesus" too.

I better not type god with a lower case "g" either.

oops

HELP SETTLE A DEBATE:

is there a differance between being "nuts" and being "crazy?"

my friend and I are having a disagreement.

where do you stand on this important issue.

25 MINUTES TO GO

They're buildin' the gallows outside my cell.
I got 25 minutes to go.
And in 25 minutes I'll be in Hell.
I got 24 minutes to go.
Well, they give me some beans for my last meal.
23 minutes to go.
And you know... nobody asked me how I feel.
I got 22 minutes to go.
So, I wrote to the Gov'nor... the whole damned bunch.
Ahhh... 21 minutes to go.
And I call up the Mayor, and he's out to lunch.
I got 20 more minutes to go.
Well, the Sheriff says, "Boy, I wanna watch you die".
19 minutes to go.
I laugh in his face... and I spit in his eye.
I got 18 minutes to go.
Well...I call out to the Warden to hear my plea.
17 minute to go.
He says, "Call me back in a week or three.
You've got 16 minutes to go."
Well, my lawyer says he's sorry he missed my case.
Mmmm....15 minutes to go.
Yeah, well if you're so sorry, come up and take my place.
I got 14 minutes to go.
Well, now here comes the padre to save my soul
With 13 minutes to go.
And he's talkin' about burnin', but I'm so damned cold.
I got 12 more minutes to go.
Now they're testin' the trap. It chills my spine.
I got 11 minutes to go.
'Cuz the goddamned thing it works just fine.
I got 10 more minutes to go.
I'm waitin' for the pardon... gonna set me free
With 9 more minutes to go.
But this ain't the movies, so to hell with me.
I got 8 more minutes to go.
And now I'm climbin up the ladder with a scaffold peg
With 7 more minutes to go.
I've betta' watch my step or else I'll break my leg.
I got 6 more minutes to go.
Yeah... with my feet on the trap and my head in the noose...
5 more minutes to go.
Well, c'mon somethin' and cut me loose.
I got 4 more minutes to go.
I can see the mountains. I see the sky.
3 more minutes to go.
And it's too damned pretty for a man to die.
i got 2 more minutes to go
I can hear the buzzards... hear the crows.
1 more minute to go.
And now I'm swingin' and here I gooooooooo....

-Shel Silverstein

MONDAYS SUCK!

I am starting a weekly post in which I will find you something to do at work...instead of work.

go here and create your own super hero.

I will post up my creation monday night.

have fun and tell your boss I am sorry for you not getting any work done today.

CHINESE PROVERBS

virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.

man who run in front of car get tired.

man who run behind car get exhausted.

man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.

man with one chopstick go hungry.

man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.

man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.

panties not best thing on earth! but next to best thing on earth.

war does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.

wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.

man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

it take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.

man who drive like hell, bound to get there.

man who stand on toilet is high on pot.

man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.

crowded elevator smell different to midget.

and my favorite:

man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.


anyone else know any good proverbs?


*thanks to araider

WHO WANTS ONE?

naked couple duvet cover

I don't even know what a duvet cover is used for but this is funny.

btw...on the other side of the cover are their backsides. I don't know that I would want to look under the covers and see a mans backside right next to my crotch area but to each his/her own.

I would probably want to either turn the cover over and have the chick on top of me or switch sides of the bed with my wife.

WHO SAID THIS IN 1991?

"I think that the proposition of going to Baghdad is also fallacious. I think if we were going to remove Saddam Hussein we would have had to go all the way to Baghdad, we would have to commit a lot of force because I do not believe he would wait in the Presidential Palace for us to arrive. I think we'd have had to hunt him down. And once we'd done that and we'd gotten rid of Saddam Hussein and his government, then we'd have had to put another government in its place.

What kind of government? Should it be a Sunni government or Shi'i government or a Kurdish government or Ba'athist regime? Or maybe we want to bring in some of the Islamic fundamentalists? How long would we have had to stay in Baghdad to keep that government in place? What would happen to the government once U.S. forces withdrew? How many casualties should the United States accept in that effort to try to create clarity and stability in a situation that is inherently unstable?

I think it is vitally important for a President to know when to use military force. I think it is also very important for him to know when not to commit U.S. military force. And it's my view that the President got it right both times, that it would have been a mistake for us to get bogged down in the quagmire inside Iraq."

did you figure out who it is? click here to find out.

I guess they knew what they were getting into. he seems to have had it figured out in 1991.

I wonder what would have changed his mind?

money? power? love?

yeah maybe he did it for love...

maybe it was a combination of his love for power and helping to make his friends lot of money.

heuy lewis and the news must of had it backwards...it's not "the power of love" it's "the love of power"...but I guess that's not as snappy a tune.



this week howard dean referenced the vietnam war and stated this:

"I do not believe in making the same mistake twice, and America appears to have made the same mistake twice,(I wish bush would) have paid more attention to the history of Iraq before we had gotten in there."

at least someone has some balls to admit we may be in over our head.

bush's response?

"I know we're going to win. Our troops need to hear not only are they supported, but that we have got a strategy that will win."

that whole comment is a bunch of shit...HE is the one who has not defined what winning is (ie. no clear exit strategy, no timeline) but yet he wants us to believe that if we have any other opinion other than "stay in till bush says we're done" then you are a nut who doesn't support our troops. then again...howard dean can be nutty sometimes.

I was eating lunch a few days back and heard a man talking (ok...I admit I was eavesdropping) about when he was in vietnam. he stated..."you know what the soldiers in iraq would say if we told them they were coming home tomorrow...they wouldn't say "...but sir my job isn't done yet" because they believe their job IS done. they went into iraq, took baghdad, found saddam and have done their best to secure the country. so they wouldnt say..."I would love to hang around..." they would say "we are going home? great! where is my bag...I need to pack!"

do we really believe that our troops do not want to come home?

the problem is that they have to do what the commander and chief says to do...

on the other hand it is our job as citizens to let our president know that he should be doing what is in our best interests as a county. he is hired to represent us!

so...mr president I ask you...why don't you come join the majority of us who believe that:

1. this war was a mistake
2. you mislead us to war
3. we want the war over and our troops home
4. we don't trust you.


sources:
1.CNN/USA Today/Gallup Poll, November 11-13, 2005 "In view of the developments since we first sent our troops to Iraq, do you think the United States made a mistake in sending troops to Iraq, or not?" 54% Made a mistake 45% Did not make a mistake
2.NBC News/Wall Street Journal Poll, November 4-7, 2005 "Do you think President Bush gave the country the most accurate information he had before going to war with Iraq, or do you think President Bush deliberately misled people to make the case for war with Iraq?"
57% Misled 35% Most accurate
3.NBC News/Wall Street Journal Poll, November 4-7, 2005 "Do you think that the United States should maintain its current troop level in Iraq to help secure peace and stability, or should the United States reduce its number of troops now that Iraq has adopted a constitution?"
57% Reduce number 36% Maintain level
4.ABC News/Washington Post Poll, October 30 - November 2, 2005 "Please tell me whether the following statement applies to Bush or not: He is honest and trustworthy
Yes: 40% No: 58%"

*sorry if this post rambles on and on...It's late and I needed to rant.

WAL-MART DANCE PARTY

I was having a problem with blogger yesterday. sorry about no post.




I found this great link of a wal-mart dance party at toilet paper: the blog.

looks like a lot of fun and a non-violent way of protesting wal mart.

just head into any wal-mart with a bunch of friends...crank up some tunes in the electronic section...dance till they shut you down!

go here and check out all three dance party's that took place on nov 26. black friday.

After numerous rounds of "We don't know if Osama is still alive?", Osama himself decided to send George Bush a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game.

Bush opened the letter and it appeared to contain a single line of coded message:

370HSSV-0773H

Bush was baffled, so he e-mailed it to Condi Rice. Condi and her aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI. No one could solve it at the FBI so it went to the CIA, then to the NSA.

With no clue as to its meaning they eventually asked Britain's MI-6 for help. Within a minute MI-6 cabled the White House with this reply: "Tell the President he's holding the message upside down!"

HOSTEL

so I sat down to do a full on 'movie news'* and stumbled upon this german publicity poster for the movie hostel that comes out january 13th. I don't know how many of you are even interested in twisted horror/slasher films but I have to admit I am really looking forward to this one.

not to mention it is "presented" by quentin tarantino.

for those of you that don't know...if quentin tarantino put his name on a movie that just showed a still shot of a venus fly-trap waiting for a fly for two hours with it's climatic ending being that it misses getting the fly...I would probably go see it then wait longingly for the dvd with bonus footage of the fly-trap doing nothing.

as for this movie...watch the trailer here and tell me you aren't at least a little curious.

what I find interesting is the blurb about "inspired by true events". I have to wonder where all this crazy shit was going on.

ps. the tag line on the movie german poster is "try not to barf."

brilliant.

*the plan is to do a full 'movie news' this weekend so look for it in the next day or two.